Hi

[lliira]

I am going through a very weird time right now. My back is much better than it was and much better than the doctors told me it ever could be, and all because I had a depressive episode after moving and was therefore confined to bed for months. Which was against doctors' orders, and against a lot of new and fancy studies. They used to prescribe bed rest, now they prescribe surgery, I no longer trust anything they say. That extraordinarily painful surgery I got diminished my pain somewhat for a while, but nothing like bed rest did.

Also: I stopped taking 2/3 of the drugs doctors had prescribed. Or, I guess, 2/4, because I still take Meloxicam for period cramps. (Oh noes using a drug for other than it was prescribed!)  My brain is now able to do thinky things closer to the level it could before I threw out my back, but it hasn't flexed in a long time, so I'm out of practice. This is an extremely odd feeling.

So: I'm still in pain all the time, but it is bearable pain. It doesn't follow me into all of my dreams. It doesn't intrude on everything I do constantly. No more running, hiking, dancing, or everyday activities that require bending or standing much, but I can look around and go, "huh, it's actually nice to be alive." 

I have a lot of rage, though. Usually when I am angry, I am able to get it out (as I'm sure is noticeable) and move on and/or refine my views. Right now, I feel like if I start ranting about doctors and nurses and what they did and did not do for and to me, I would not stop.

Comments

[redsixwing]

Off-label use! Off-label use! Stop the presses and alert the pigeon squad?

I'm glad to hear from you, and also glad that you've got the upper hand on pain.

Would ranting be helpful?