A timeline

[lliira]

Years of back pain, finally getting surgery___Severe back pain is even worse after surgery__3 weeks later, severe back pain is now mild back pain, yay! Oh and I have a cold___Cold is gone but now I have really bad cramps___cramps fading, but now eye hurts___cramps are gone but I seem to have scratched my cornea and it really hurts and is annoying

CAN I HAVE ONE DAMN DAY WHERE MY BODY IS JUST KIND OF OKAY PLEASE. I'm seriously starting to feel like my body doesn't know how to deal with being kind of okay after years of unbearable pain, so it is seeking out problems and injuries to maintain the status quo. 

Comments

[quantumreality]

I can't imagine what it must be like to one day realize that something you've lived with isn't there anymore and you've got to reorient yourself to the new circumstances.

*has lots of hope for you though!* It sounds like the surgery has worked. \o/

[lliira]

It is very strange. Especially because it's not going back to how I was before at all. I still can't go on hikes or stand for long or even drive. I can't bend and lift things. My doctor has ordered me not to get on the floor, though I am allowed to take baths. I will have to find a store that lets me buy different sized shoes for each foot. I am still on powerful prescription painkillers. And I will have to have this surgery every 3 months to 2 years for the rest of my life, though the doctor hopes it won't cause me as much pain as it did the first time.

I'm not really sure where I'm going from here, and maybe these weird things keep happening to my body as a way of giving me time to think about it, idk.

[(Anonymous)]

Argh, sorry to hear that- hope you feel better soon!

-Duamuteffe

[lliira]

Thanks! I am feeling much better; the eye thing was just a corneal scratch and is almost completely healed now. And I went to the doctor today and she will probably prescribe me pills that will make me only have one period a year, and it might happen before my next period, so I'm excited about that.