lliira: Fang from FF13 (Default)
Lliira ([personal profile] lliira) wrote2012-08-25 11:04 pm

This Word-Book makes my Thought-Brain feel Hurt-Pain

Content note: racism, atrocious writing, Life-Bands

So, in the interest of learning first-hand about horrible novels before condemning them, I'm slogging through the "search inside" section of the racist novel  Save the Pearls by Victoria Foyt. And it's racist and terrible. Even without the racism, it would be terrible, though without the racism it wouldn't exist, so that ends up in a weird loop. Right now, though, I'm looking at the bad writing. Here are the obnoxious, dated, L. Ron Hubbardesque terms in the book.

Beauty Map (3)
Life-Band (3, the sentence after "Beauty Map")
Priority One (3)
Coal (4)
Holo-Images (4)
World-Band (4)
The Heat (5) This one would be acceptable if we hadn't already been inundated with similar terms.
Life-Band again, twice (5) (count: 3)
Uni-Gov after the expression "Thank Earth" (6)
Life-Band twice in three sentences (6). It now looks even less like a word than it did at first. (count: 5)
World-Band (6) (count: 2)
Pearls (6)
Polka-Dot Bikini (6) Yep, she capitalized it.
Beauty Map (6) (count: 2)
Pearl (6) (count: 2, and I have a feeling this one is going to get very high)
Coal (6) (count: 2, and ditto)
Coal (6) (count: 3)
Life-Band (6) (count:6)
Pearls (6) (count: 3)
Coal (7) (count: 4)
Life-Bands (8) (count: 7) I still don't know exactly what these things are.
Mood Scents (8) 
Midnight Luster (8) I would think this was a brand name in another book.
Coals (8) (count: 5)

That's the end of the free excerpt. Total count of ridiculous capitalized terms: twenty-six in four and a half pages.

Next time, I think I'll count how many sentences start with conjunctions. I usually don't mind sentences that start with conjunctions, but this is ridiculous.
iosonochesono: (Default)

[personal profile] iosonochesono 2012-08-26 04:16 am (UTC)(link)
Oh I saw about that book in either SF_D on LiveJournal or ONTD_P. Ugh.