Sooo... who else suspects Frank Churchill poisoned his aunt? He has a huge fight with Jane and rides home quickly. Mrs. Churchill "had not lived above six-and-thirty hours after his return. A sudden seizure of a different nature from any thing foreboded by her [Mrs. Churchill's] general state, had carried her off after a short struggle."
Person (almost always a girl or woman): X is maybe being shitty and making me feel shitty and I've told them the problems and they won't change. *lists examples of X being incredibly terribly shitty to the nth degree* Are they actually being shitty or should I stop having any feelings at all, because I have been raised to believe I am disallowed from having feelings?
Me: X is being so shitty. SO shitty. Your feelings are more than justified.
Person: More about X being shitty, worry about having feelings/being "irrational".
Me: X is being shitty. You are more than justified in your feelings and are totally rational.
Person: Okay, but I should let X continue to be totally shitty toward me because I don't want to hurt their feelings.
Me: *looks up how to make an earthquake machine*
Also I'm going to start counting how many guild invites I get tonight. It's been at least 5 so far.
ETA: Image under the cut. Scroll to the bottom to see the pertinent part, highlighted in pink.
ETA2: Never mind. It was in web layout somehow. Though I wonder why that made it 10 pages rather than one continuous page. Anyway, dunno how it happened, but it's fixed now and I feel silly. (501 pages. Wheee.)
( Yes that's the proper wordcount )
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What it comes down to is this: a BDSM relationship is not, at its core, different from any other kind of relationship. Respect, give and take, and honesty are all necessary. Anyone who tries to tell you differently is lying about BDSM in order to abuse. That's what abusers do: they take good ideas (love, family, social justice, compassion, forgiveness, etc.) and turn them into poison.
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